A Season to Reset: Reconnecting With Ourselves and Each Other This Fall

An image of the grounds of Kripalu in Fall, with a quote from Carolyn overtop: "When you tend to your relationship as a living, breathing source of energy, love stops being something you case and becomes the ground you stand on."

Autumn is nature’s big reminder that change isn’t just possible, it’s necessary. The trees let go of the leaves no longer serving them, the air cools around us, and we have the opportunity to slow down after the craziness of summer. If we take this time with intention, we can be walking through the world with a sharper sense of what matters and deeper relationships to ourselves and everyone who is important to us. 

For many of us, that includes noticing where we’ve drifted…maybe from ourselves, maybe from our partner, or maybe from the people in our lives who once brought laughter and light but now just get whatever scraps of energy we have left after everything on our to-do lists.

In my work with couples and individuals over the last three decades, I’ve seen how connection erodes not with one big blowout, but in the everyday neglect of those moments where survival mode takes over and we stop tending to each other. The good news is that the habits that dim our joy can be replaced with new ones, and it doesn’t take a total life overhaul to do it.

That’s the heart of Fire It Up: Connection thrives not in grand gestures, but in the small, deliberate practices that stack up over time. You don’t need the perfect moment or hours of free time: you need ten seconds to breathe before snapping back, a minute to ask a better question, or a walk outside to remind yourself that the world keeps turning whether you’ve answered all your emails or not. 

Fall practically begs us to practice this: pausing to feel the crisp air, watching the trees put on their show, letting ourselves be reminded that slowing down is how we savor love, not how we lose it.

And there’s science to this seasonal rhythm. Across species, fall signals a time to harvest, reset, and prepare for the slower months ahead. Animals begin to rest and conserve energy. Plants shed leaves to direct resources to the roots. Our bodies, too, are wired for cycles of exertion and recovery, growth and renewal. 

After the intensity of summer, with its push for productivity and activity, fall offers a natural moment for grounding. Even in family life, the rhythm shifts—babies growing into toddlers moving more independently and needing different kinds of attention. Kids head back to school, and space opens up for reflection and recalibration. 

Neuroscience confirms that these pauses are not wasted time: they’re when the brain consolidates learning, repairs stress-related wear and tear, and builds the foundation for resilience. Our nervous systems need this rest just as much as our relationships do.

And it starts with the intention to ground, reset and reconnect. The way we relate to our own minds and bodies shapes how we show up in every other bond we hold. When we treat ourselves with presence and kindness, we have more to offer our partners, our kids, our friends, our colleagues. This isn’t self-indulgence, it’s the foundation for the relationships that sustain us. The real growth edge in our world isn’t just more efficiency or productivity. Growth is healthier, more intentional relationships at every level.

If you’re reading this at home and wondering how to start, here are two simple ways to bring a fall reset into your life right now:

1. Build in a daily pause. Step outside, breathe in the cooler air, and ask yourself one grounding question: “What matters most to me today?” (For a bonus: take that question to your partner or a friend to deepen the experience!) 

   
   

2. Offer one act of connection. Send the text you’ve been putting off, make eye contact and thank the barista, or tell someone close to you one specific thing you appreciate about them. Notice what happens in your body when you do this. 

   
   

For my work, this fall brings my favorite professional gig: retreats, and the opportunity to lead people through this. I have been invited to Kripalu where I will bring these practices to life in a weekend retreat designed to help you reset and reconnect. 

It’s open to couples, singles, friends, and anyone curious about building relationships that are deeper, more joyful, and a whole lot more resilient. We’ll mix reflection with play, mindfulness with science-backed tools, and you’ll leave not just inspired but equipped with real strategies to keep the fire alive. I hope you join us. 

As a special gift for my people, anyone who registers through me gets a signed copy of my book AND a coaching session anytime in the months after the retreat to integrate the process back at home. Just let me know you saw this and that you are coming and I will bring you a copy of my book and we will set up a follow up! 

📅 November 14–16, 2025📍 Kripalu, Stockbridge, MA

https://kripalu.org/presenters-programs/reignite-joy-intimacy-and-connection-fire-it-experience